Writing the perfect wedding speech
Groom, bride, best man, groomsmen, maid of honor, bridesmaids and parents of the bride and bride-groom – all of you will have to write wedding speeches and deliver them during the reception. Basically, you are giving a toast to the happiness of the newly-weds with a few ice-breakers and jokes thrown in to liven up the speech. It's a simple affair, really, when you know how to get about it.
Greatest wedding speech ever!
.General things to keep in mind
Always remember that the main purpose of all wedding toasts and speeches are to honor the bridal couple. Therefore, you should never directly or indirectly criticize anybody who you may not like or respect. Any wedding is meant to be a happy occasion no matter how rocky the path may have been towards it. Then again, what newly wedded couple hasn't encountered an opposition or two against their wedding plans? With that said, wedding speeches vary from one person to the next depending on his role in the couple's lives and in the wedding day itself. As such, your wedding toast is to the couple, not to anyone else's honor. You may thank other people but make sure they are relevant to the couple.
You may throw in a few jokes as ice-breakers but be very sure that these will not offend anyone among the guests, especially not the couple and their parents. To avoid committing this speech faux pas, you can always ask close family and friends about the things that the couple like and dislike as well as their sense of humor and sensibilities. For example, if you are a close friend to the groom but not to the bride, it makes sense to discreetly ask the groom for pointers.
Other things to avoid in wedding speeches are sexually vulgar jokes (think of the general guests' sensibilities as well as any kids present), action ice-breakers (make them laugh but don't let them do silly actions to make them do so) and thinly-veiled insults against race, religion and sexuality (respect the couple's choices even when you are fundamentally against them). If you cannot help but make either one of these toast faux pas, it’s probably best to just listen to other people’s speech and keep yourself away from the microphone. Ultimately, your wedding speech should be inclusive by making your audience laugh a little, reflect a little and love a lot.
Plan Ahead
Keep in mind that even professional writers of wedding speeches will require at least a few day's worth of allowance to make your commissioned wedding toast. This is because planning is an essential part of making speeches of any sort unless you plan to give an ad-hoc speech that rambles on into infinity and beyond or is so short nobody noticed it. For your part, you can start planning your speech a few weeks before the wedding. If possible, jot down all the ideas that come into your head, even the lousiest jokes and silliest ice-breakers you come across. You will not be using all of them, of course, but at least you have a wealth of material to choose from. As you start writing your wedding speech/toast, just remember the general parameters mentioned above.
Also, you can conduct a brainstorming session with the other family and guests who are required to give wedding speeches. You can gather more material in these sessions as well as exchange ideas on the best things to say about the couple. At the very least, you can gain deeper insights into how your speech should turn out in order to please the people who matter most – the couple. Plus, it never hurts to make your speech unique from each other! Furthermore, you can browse through the internet for inspiration. Yes, with the numerous sample wedding toasts and speeches online, you definitely will not run out of ideas. The key, however, is not to copy whole wedding speeches but to make the speech your own by tweaking on some details.
Write It Down
At least three days before the wedding, you should start writing down your final draft. Of course, you may have to write many drafts and discard even more drafts but that's what your laptop is for! Well, of course, you can actually write it with pen and paper, if you so desire.
Before starting to write, read through all your notes, discard the ones that you feel are vulgar, sexist, racist, offensive, and irrelevant and then organize the good material into a coherent pattern in your head. Don't worry if it feels rough around the edges because that's only natural.
Now, you may start writing based on your chosen material. Just keep in mind that good wedding speeches have a beginning (say your thanks and greet everybody), a middle (insert a short anecdote) and an end (toast to the happiness of the couple). Of course, ice-breakers start the speech while jokes can be peppered throughout it.
No matter what you write, remember the ultimate test of any speech during a special and personal occasion are what I like to call, “the three S’s” – that is, keep it Short, Sincere and Simple!